Sissy is doing so good. The new medication she has seems to be working. She even went to the store with me today and did some grocery shopping! She is now exhausted and recuperating but she looks beautiful.
I read through the MRI this morning and it appears that it is in her lower vertebrae and pelvis. The doctor wants to do another bone scan to verify everything as apparently if the cancer takes over thin bones, such as the pelvis, it can actually cause the bones to break. He also mentioned doing radiation on it. That is also a possibility IF IF IF IF IF IF IF IF IF IF IF IF IF IF IF IF IF IF IF IF the brain scan turns out fucked up too.
Today, so far, has been a manageable day. It's so much easier to deal with when sissy is ok. Last week when she couldn't move, needed help being dressed and became too exhausted to even chew her food, well, that's when I'm not okay and become enraged that this is happening.
The kids are good. Valentina is really beginning to grasp what is going on now. Asa is just a champ. He's a real trouper. We couldn't ask for better children.
Yesterday after chemo, sissy had an appointment with her psychiatrist. She was VERY loopy from the benadryl and quite heavily medicated. Anyway, I don't even know why I mentioned this stuff, but when she was talking to the doctor about her feelings, etc.. she said it was going to be hard when she loses her hair. Having her say it out loud was like BAM! almost hearing the diagnosis all over again. It took me a few seconds to realize what she was saying. I'm not an idiot, I've seen the beautiful headwear she's received from Gmom, I've seen her wig, I've seen her IN her wig, I bought her satin pillowcases because I remember how sore her head will get. I know that she will lose her hair. I've seen her lose her hair. It's just every once in a while something like that happens and it slaps me in the face again that yes, sissy has cancer. Again. I'll never stop wanting to vomit when I type or say those words.
All in all, well, life is life. I'm not raging right now, not at this minute anyway! I just hope like hell they don't do the brain scan/additional bone scan on Friday. Friday's never bring good news. She's had two oncology appointments on a Friday and the MRI was done/report done, on a Friday. In fact I might rename them Fuck Off Friday. That sounds about right. Who would have thought we would be longing for the days when the cancer was "just" in her liver.
Sissy got her disabled parking placard. SCORE! Wouldn't you know it, today when we went to the store we were all excited to use it and we ended up getting a kick ass "normal" parking spot, even better than the disabled ones.
Thank you for the prayers and keep 'em coming!