We were the closest family possible. Our world was turned upside down on 05/03/09 when my best friend, the person I love most next only to our children, my sister Trina was diagnosed with stage IV breast cancer. Her body gave out on her on 01/09/10 but she will ALWAYS be a part of our daily life and will continue to be in my posts. I started my blog to chronicle our daughter's international adoption from Guatemala and have continued to use it as a journal.

What you will find is my family trying to adapt to our new lives that were handed to us.

Saturday, January 23, 2010

Empty Chair

Today we had a big family lunch. We're trying to do it more often as it's a surefire way to get Joshua to eat. I set all 8 places. Mom said we were 1 too many but I told her I couldn't set only 7. Later on while we were eating, Asa saw the empty chair and asked who was going to sit there. I told him it was an extra.
He looked sad and I asked him if he wanted me to put that chair away. He said yes..... then thought about it and I could tell he understood what it meant so he shook his head, "no, just leave it there." THAT is what I have a problem with, Asa having to grow up without his precious mum.


nicole r. said...

cameo - it sucks; there is always going to be an emptiness, like something is missing and it is missing. after my mom passed... i just always having a little feeling of "emptiness" or "what's missing" kind of feeling. and you know what, it's okay to talk about too like what you do Asa. And yes it sucks having to be little growing up with a mom - i'm sorry for him and i wish that i could do something so that wasn't so. always thinking of you guys.

Sonia said...

Cameo, it just breaks my heart when I think of Asa growing up without his Mum. I know I will never fully understand the pain you are feeling. Please know that each and every one of you are in my prayers every day. Especially sweet little Asa. Please give him and extra hug from his cousins up North. We love you guys.


Yes,sadly Asa has to grow up with out his Mum being there in body but she will always be with him in spirit. Through the love and thoughtfulness you will always have for him and his dad, through the closeness your entire family shares Asa will always feel the love his Mum had for him. I know you will never feel it's enough and you're right it won't ever feel enough without Trina being there with you all but Cameo, I just want you to know you are the best and you are honouring Trina by the way you are living.

sorry for the rambling, just coming from the heart.


Cheryl Jones said...

I have tears streaming down my face reading this tonight Cameo. I think of you all constantly. When there are no words that can be said, may you feel loved by those that are here for you.

wy-not said...

Words are not enough. When the spirit and the feeling and the heartache are too big to be contained, I think they just have to burst forth in the form of the love you show to each other. It's all we have, right? In my humble opinion, you're doing everything you can do to help that precious little boy, and the rest of your aching family. Talking about your sister will keep her there with all of you. But oh what a real and tragic loss this is. I just pray that God wraps you all in a loving cocoon of peace and comfort while this open wound heals. My heart goes out to you in every way.

Sandy <3 <3

Suzanne said...

Poor little guy. It breaks my heart thinking about him not having his mother.

Candy said...

You know THAT is what I have a problem with too! But I think the Empty Chair would make a good Family Tradition...especially at the holidays so that her memory never fades away to Asa...and because her spirit needs some place to sit....HUGS