Why am I doing this? A few reasons.
First, nothing is changing. Life keeps getting harder and harder. Reality sets in for a bit and then I go back to being in shock and so forth. Life is hell. The kids make us happy. Again, I don't ever want to give the impression that all we do is sit around and cry because we don't. But all of my updates are depressing and there aren't any comments that help (sorry, just being blunt) because NOTHING helps. Nothing does one fucking bit of good except for the kids. So I figure why blog the same shit on a different day just to blog? I'm sure you all are tired of hearing the same shit. I'm tired of feeling the same shit. I may update from time to time with milestones. Asa has soccer coming up, which in and of itself is a land mine. I can't even think that far ahead because it takes everything I have to get through the day. See what I mean? My life is depressing.
Second, rather than journal everything out here and bum everyone out I've starting documenting my life in a book I've always wanted to write and have started many, many times. I have no idea if I'll finish it but right now it's been really weird (cool weird) to sit down to write about one small thing (sometimes it's about our childhood, sometimes it's about sissy and I playing hooky from work and having a long lunch and then shopping) and I find all these stories and adventures that I had forgotten about just come pouring out. So for now my writing is going in there.
So there you go. See you all sometime.