Valentina has been sick for about the past 9 days. Her low grade fever left about five days ago but she's still had a sore throat and a bit of a cough. She does pretty good during the day but by evening she's worn out and tired. She had me up around 3am a few nights ago so I laid with her and she asked me, with her eyes closed and so tired, "mama, when am I gonna stop coughing?" She asked mom yesterday (who was up with her at 4am and rocked her) "Beya, when am I gonna be well?"
I took her in to the doctor today and he told me what I already knew; Valentina needs surgery to remove her tonsils. They are so big they are causing her kiddie sleep apnea.
I'm dreading it but the past few weeks I've been telling mom and Norm that once her cold cleared up I wanted to get going on having her tonsils removed.
Ever since Valentina came home her doctor and I have been having this discussion. There was a small chance her little body would catch up to her massive tonsils but I knew this would happen.
I know it's a routine surgery but I still hate the thought of it. The fact that we'll be having it done at the same hospital sissy died is not fun either. Asa has had three surgeries but they weren't as invasive. He was born with a clogged tear duct so he basically had to have it roter rootered. Next came a cyst removal on the top of his ear. The cyst grew back so he had to have it removed again and that did the job. Trina didn't want us at any of the surgeries because she wanted it as low key as possible and didn't want to freak Asa out by having all of us there.
For a split second today I thought to myself "yeah, I bet Trina won't stay home when Valentina has her surgery! I'm sure she'll have to be there!" I'd like to believe she WILL be there, watching over her Vali but I don't know what happens after someone dies. Half of the time I think you just die and that's it, you don't go anywhere, your soul dies too. The other time I want so badly to believe her soul did go to heaven and she's up there with Jesus and our grandma who she loved so much. Here's the bitchy part of me coming out; any time someone says to me "oh, she's up there all right" I want to say "yeah, and you also told me 'Trina will be fine, she'll beat this cancer, I KNOW it'."
So that's it, Valentina needs surgery. I'm waiting to hear back from the ENT. I would like this done ASAP so I can just get it done and over with so Valentina can finally breathe normally and she won't have to deal with a sore throat all the time or struggle to breathe when she gets sick.