So I've had a few blog posts composed in my head and even started writing one, a great one, a profound, a highly emotional one but things weren't working out right so I scrapped it.
Instead I will relay something to you that was told to me today in a very offhanded way at the doctor (I'm not kidding on this):
"Okay, so I'm just going to inject a radioactive dye into you that will go only to your gallbladder and then after that sits an hour I'll inject something else and then we'll see how you feel."
Oh, okay, because yeah, that sounds so totally normal and run of the mill. Sure, shoot me up with some radioactive dye! Sign me up! Where do I stand in line?
The funny thing is the test came back that something is wrong and I'm being referred to a surgeon. I'll probably need to have my gallbladder removed.
Is it just me or does that sound like something an OLD person has done? I can remember being an adult when mom had hers out. I have two young kids! I'm not old enough to have to have my gallbladder removed! The word alone sounds so ancient and grandparent-y. I remember my grandma burping incessantly and saying it was because of her gallbladder. As I write this I can smell the menthol cough drop aroma that would come out of her mouth accompanied by an ungodly loud belch that would scare small children worse than any John Carpenter movie.
So that is what I associate with the word "gallbladder". It's like it reverberates with the same force that would almost shake the floorboards underneath my grandma when she burped. Don't get me wrong, I loved my grandma very much, she was so kind to us, she was like a second mom to us, she loved us very much, she was very loving and maternal. I love her and miss her but man, she could give any dinosaur a run for their money when it came to burping.
Ok, this post completely wrote itself and went in a direction I wasn't expecting!
As a change of pace I'm going to answer 10 questions I've always wanted James Lipton to ask me. Jen, since you have my same love of Q&A I'm going to ask you to do a post with YOUR answers to the same 10 questions.
1. What is your favorite word?
Love. I say it all the time. I love you. I love this. I loved that. You'll love it.
2. What is your least favorite word?
No joke it's probably burp. Or fart. Or poop. There's a lot of potty talk in our house due to an 8 year old boy who thinks it's hilarious and has taught his sister that it's funny too so it drives me bonkers.
3. What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally?
Music. Music is an answer to all three. A certain song can bring me to my knees in sobs or cause me to pull over and cry. Music also encourages me to write. I love to listen to my iPod and write.
4. What turns you off creatively, spiritually or emotionally?
5. What sound or noise do you love?
The kids laughing and talking to each other when they don't know I'm listening. Or when they're trying to be quiet and sneaky and talk to each other when they're supposed to be asleep and they don't understand that I can hear them despite the fact I'm laying in bed in between them. Apparently they think I'm dead asleep if I'm in bed. It's hilarious to listen to them.
6. What sound or noise do you hate?
Vomit. Anyone vomiting especially myself.
7. What is your favorite curse word?
Oh fuck if I know anything worth a shit about this dumbass question.
8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?
9. What profession would you not like to do?
I hold them in highest regard but there's no way in hell I could ever be a teacher.
10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?
Here's your sister.