We were the closest family possible. Our world was turned upside down on 05/03/09 when my best friend, the person I love most next only to our children, my sister Trina was diagnosed with stage IV breast cancer. Her body gave out on her on 01/09/10 but she will ALWAYS be a part of our daily life and will continue to be in my posts. I started my blog to chronicle our daughter's international adoption from Guatemala and have continued to use it as a journal.

What you will find is my family trying to adapt to our new lives that were handed to us.

Friday, November 01, 2013

Cameo's Camry

I sold my car.

I sold my 2000 Toyota Camry. The first (and so far only) brand new vehicle we ever bought. I loved my car. My car was me. It was just a car but it was a part of me as stupid as that sounds. It was exactly what I wanted. I had done so much research on it before we found it.

I've been needing a newer vehicle, my Camry is almost 14 years old. We've outgrown it. We outgrew it years ago but I haven't wanted to sell it. I've always had the irrational thought in my back of my mind "but sissy won't know it's me if we're driving around town separately and we see each other. She won't know about my new car. She won't see me in my new car. She won't know me." As irrational as this sounds just a few days ago I saw a truck like hers turn in front of me and I did a double take to see if it was her or Joshua driving it. Needless to say it wasn't even her truck (Josh has it parked) but whenever I see a truck like hers I always check to see if it IS her driving. I always have the first thought of "why is she out driving by herself? Whey didn't she have me drive? She always has me drive her around! What the hell is she doing on her own?"

Norm has fought me on selling his truck. He wanted and waited for his truck for so long and he finally got it June 2007, just before we went to visit Valentina. He loved his truck. Even after he got a company car almost 3 years ago he refused to sell his truck. His argument was that if we sold his truck and I got something for me then if he needed to go somewhere on the weekend and I was gone (yeah, that happens ALL the time ~eye roll~) then he would need his truck. I kept after him saying we didn't need his truck. If that rare situation ever DID happen then he could use the Camry. Norm finally countered that he'd sell his truck if I sold my Camry.


Almost three years have gone by since we have no longer needed his truck. We've used it only a handful of times.

Almost four years have gone since sissy died. There's no way or reason why she would need to know what I'm driving.

I've slowly been allowing thoughts into my mind about selling my car. My beloved car that has seen so many road trips both before and after sissy died. Road trips that the car and the family went on, even if I didn't. There were more than a few times that Beya and Papa would take it to California, Trina and Josh would take it to Seattle, mom and papa would drive it to the cabin, etc..... After Trina died and we tried to be out of town more and more on significant dates (second brain scan with these results, MRI reading, her birthday, tumor marker numbers soared, etc..) or just to get out of town for something, my car faithfully drove us while we cried and knew what we were trying to escape.

One such escape was hands down the best one. On September 23rd we went to have lunch in Seattle with Jen. That still remains one of the highlights of our road trips taken with Camry after sissy died.

I love my Stripey Jen <3 nbsp="" p="">

Anyway, flash forward to the past month or so. I started to almost purge. Save for the handful of things that were sissy's that I will NEVER part ways with, there is so much additional "stuff" that I don't need. I don't need my car to remember her. 

I started having discussions with Norm over selling BOTH vehicles. His truck. My Camry. Getting something newer for me with seating for 7. We haven't had a car payment is almost 10 years so that's a bit scary but if we were to sell both the truck, the car, add in the amount of what we were pre-approved for (and can easily handle the car payment) well, then the Camry may not be the  last brand new car I buy. 

I sold my car last Thursday in literally 5 minutes. 

My car is gone. 

I sold my Camry. 

The truck is up for sale as of tonight and less than an hour after I put it up we already had three people call on it, very interested, wanting to set up times to come by and take a look at it. 

Holy shit. We might actually have both vehicles sold and I won't have anything to drive. 

It's a good thing my parents just bought a great looking Toyota Camry. The person they bought it from was the original owner and loved it very much ;)

**** The last part of this post was Ambiposted so I apologize in advance for any grammatical errors or typos. ****