We were the closest family possible. Our world was turned upside down on 05/03/09 when my best friend, the person I love most next only to our children, my sister Trina was diagnosed with stage IV breast cancer. Her body gave out on her on 01/09/10 but she will ALWAYS be a part of our daily life and will continue to be in my posts. I started my blog to chronicle our daughter's international adoption from Guatemala and have continued to use it as a journal.

What you will find is my family trying to adapt to our new lives that were handed to us.

Sunday, November 10, 2013

Thank You

October 26, 2013 Aviana flew away on her new wings and her ran on her old, healthy legs.

I've hesitated on writing anything about this because I just didn't know what to say. I don't know what to say when one of my best friends 7 year old child dies.

I just don't know.

What I do know what to say is to describe a little bit how Jen is. The past 4+ years we have gotten to know each other. We've laughed together on the phone and in person. We've cried together on the phone and in person. We've virtually hugged each other and in person. Although our situations are very different there has always been something that has clicked between us.

We are kind of each other's opposites.

During the past four plus years I have seen Jen as loving, passionate, frustrated, hopeful, giving, happy, sad, silly, dingy, stripes loving, grief stricken, obsessive, mama bear, direct, truthful, confused, honest, emotional and so much more.

Did you see what words I didn't write?

Angry. Mad. Unforgiving. Mistrustful. Bitter.

We are each others opposite.

I have learned so much from Jen. Other than sissy and mom, who rarely gave up hope of Trina being healed, the person I have learned the most from about not just grief but life in general is Jen.

Jen has an unbelievably wonderful way of looking at things. And I don't mean through rose colored glasses. I mean she honestly sees the good in everything. Again, not in that annoying way but in the way that makes you want to be like her. In a way that makes me look at myself and realize what my shortcomings are and want to change them. Jen has taught me not only by her perfectly well written words on her blog but by example in the way she lives her life. It is just the way she IS.

How did I learn all of this?

By "meeting" her through her blog which she started after Aviana's accident.

All of this life changing "stuff" she has taught me is actually through Aviana. We never would have met had it not been for Aviana. I never would have known how amazing and accepting "real" people could be. I always thought those sunny people didn't know how hard life could be, they hadn't experienced watching the person you love the most suffer through cancer twice. Oh no, Jen was able to show me grace under even worse circumstances.

All of this because of Aviana Reese Hodder.

Thank you.